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ChuckAndCletus.com is a Humor-oriented site featuring Fake Satire News, Funny Pictures and Photos, Commentary, etc. all centered around helping you waste time in the most efficient, stupid way possible on the internet. Nothing here should be taken too seriously unless you're either a prick or just have nothing else better to do. In either case, go away; we've been sued enough.

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Professional Back Scratching School Opened
By Cletus - Wed, Mar 24, 2010

Yazoo City, MS (UPI) - The Professional Back Scratching Institute has just opened in Mississippi and promises to teach "healing through scraping" as the latest in bodily pampering.

The school was formed by Marlene Champps, a former beauty consultant at the local "Coifs Are Us" salon. "I used to always scratch the backs of my customers while I waited for their streaks to set in or their hair to dry or any spare time I had. I've always had strong nails and everyone always loved it. I used to have old men come in for perms and they didn't even have any hair!" says Marlene.

"I'm good at back-scratching and one day a customer told me 'You should scratch backs for a living', and that thought stuck with me. I began developing techniques like 'The Scrape', 'The Flutter Tickle', and 'The Goth Dig'. Customers loved it."

The institute has enrolled 50 students so far and opens in late November. Champps recommends that all incoming and prospective students begin a nail strengthening regimen before classes begin, adding that "a chipped nail can put you out of business quick."

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Catholic Churches To Merge

older stories

The Vatican, Rome (Reuters) - Until recently, all Catholic Churches had remained separate entities. The Pope has signed a decree to begin the merger of all franchises under one corporate umbrella to save on expenses.


Concept Restaurant Going Global

newer stories

Tuscaloosa, AL (AP) - A new type of restaurant based on a new type of pricing is expanding in more ways than one. It seems that Stumpy's Eatery based in Tuscaloosa, Alabama, doesn't charge by the plate, they charge by the pound ... literally.

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