C h u c k A n d C l e t u s 2 . c o m d u m b E c a r d s . c o m r a u n c h y E c a r d s . c o m
 
"The young man wears his heart on his shoulders." --ESPN Analyst and former Ravens' linebacker Ray Lewis, referring to Adrian Peterson. Ray, you dumbass, the saying is "heart on his sleeve." - Anonymous

Chuck & Cletus Random Video

 

5,195,257 Total Page Views Since Sep 11, 2009
867 views today, 10 People on the Site NOW

Rand-O-Matic

Stern Fines Bryant, US Citizens

R2-D2 Holding Out For Bigger Payday In Star Wars Finale

Flint Fires Backfire on Fired Firefighters

Commentary: First Name Initials

 

ChuckAndCletus.com is a Humor-oriented site featuring Fake Satire News, Funny Pictures and Photos, Commentary, etc. all centered around helping you waste time in the most efficient, stupid way possible on the internet. Nothing here should be taken too seriously unless you're either a prick or just have nothing else better to do. In either case, go away; we've been sued enough.

Really stupid funny pictures, photos, satire, commentary, news,
Ranch Bomb Explodes Near President Bush
By Cletus - Wed, May 21, 2003

Crawford, TX (AP) - At approximately 6:55 pm today, a ranch bomb exploded near President Bush while he was calmly eating dinner.

Geraldine Simpkins, 32 and Manager of Lone Star Steakhouse, exclaimed "I've never seen a ranch bomb explode like that. President Bush was getting his normal ribeye and salad with 1000 island dressing when the ranch bomb exploded on the booth next to him."

"When that little ramekin of ranch dressing flew off my tray, I just watched in horror as it fell in slow motion toward the floor," explained Joyce Benson, the waitress who caused the commotion. "I never thought it would cause 6 Secret Servicemen to jump and shout so much."

"We call 'em ranch bombs because when they hit the floor, they explode in every direction. You oughta see the ketchup bombs!" added another server, Zack Beddick, "One time I had a ketchup bomb hit 5 different booths and the ceiling too; that's more air time than Michael Jordan!"

President Bush wasn't hurt but three of his bodyguards were seen changing shirts in the parking lot. Bush reportedly finished eating his steak as if nothing had happened.


1587
Rated 2.84/5 (310 Votes)

O L D E R

Vigil Honors War Heroes, Dixie Chicks

older stories

Washington DC (Reuters) - Earlier today, a crowd of over 500,000 gathered at the mall in Washington DC to honor war victims, war heroes and their families. Celebrities and politicians made speeches, shook hands and doled out numerous autographs.

N E W E R

Great White To Perform Concert For Remaining Iraqi Soldiers

newer stories

Washington, DC (Associated Press) The eighties heavy metal rock group Great White, known for its hard-hitting guitar and vocals and most recently for its disastrous show in a club in Rhode Island, will perform a similar show in Baghdad for the Iraqi soldiers who continue to resist Coalition troops.

 
Satire We Wrote - Funny Photos - Pirated Comics - Stuff Fer Sale - Commentary - About US - admin
All logos and trademarks in this site are property of their respective owner. The comments are property of their posters, all the rest © by me, Sandra Dee, Chuck, Cletus and Cecil.
Only 3 small animals were hurt while building the site, 2 of which were crushed under Chuck's truck. We are not responsible for anything written when Cecil's been drinking.

Database Design and Site Development by RCG - © Copyright 2018